On the promises

"By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises was offering up his only begotten son; it was he to whom it was said, “In Isaac your descendants shall be called.” He considered that God is able to raise people even from the dead, from which he also received him back as a type." Hebrews 11.17-19

This passage really stood out to me today. In the past week, several circumstances have led me to think about the nature of faith and how God sometimes asks us to trust Him in ways that seem impossible, or even counter to what He has previously done in our lives. Abraham spent his whole life waiting for a son, nearly giving up on the likelihood that this would ever happen. And then, as we all know, God eventually gave him Isaac, going so far as to guarantee to him that, this is it! Here is your long-awaited heir! This is the point of the story where all of the kumbaya cotton candy Christian books leave off; it's the chicken soup for the immature soul, feel-good message of inspiration and positivity. Because this is what the Christian life is all about: if we just have enough faith in God, He will eventually give us what we ask of Him.

But here's the thing. Right after God promises Abraham that Isaac is the answer to his prayers, what happens next? He asks him to sacrifice him. There have been times in my life, both recent and also in the past, where it seemed like God was doing the opposite of the will He had appeared to providentially reveal to me. Take senior year of college, for example. Everything was pointing to grad school. Relationships were a consistent no-go but my academic situation was pretty stellar; it seemed to be a clear indication that all thoughts of domesticity must be put on hold for a career. It was like you could actually see the doors opening and closing. But then, all the sudden, I got waitlisted. It was a complete shock. Why would God push me in this direction only to pull the rug out from me? It made no sense. Among the (many) lessons God taught me during that bizarre month, I had to learn that I will never fully comprehend His plan, but that it is always wiser than my own. And sometimes it will seem to make absolutely no sense. Those are the moments, though, that define what faith really is; it would be kind of meaningless if it were easy.

Abraham's confidence in God is incredible. The whole idea of being willing to lose what you thought you had miraculously won, of undergoing a double trial of faith, is such a deeper exploration of what it means to trust God. The Christian life is not a Hallmark movie. I want this kind of faith - to be fully confident in God's ability to work out the seemingly impossible; to be willing to sacrifice those things that I hold most closely to my heart; to be certain that God is good and faithful no matter what happens in this life.